Adventure #9- "I'm stopping at McDonald's on the way home . . . "

Today all eight Fearless Femmes reunited for an adventure, planned by Lisa, which she described as "Fear Factor meets happy hour."  Hmmmm . . . . hope somebody brought the Pepto! 

 

Before we headed out on our adventure, we met up at Brandi's house for a photo shoot with little Miss Tegan, proudly sporting her FF onesie!




We all love Tegan!

Future Fearless Femme

After that sweet litte distraction, it was back to the business of adventure for us!  We made the journey from south Olathe to downtown KC (again, an adventure itself for some), and found ourselves at Extra Virgin, a Spanish-inspired tapas restaurant.  We were seated in a semi-private area in the restaurant and presented with our challenge . . . their "For the adventurous" menu . . .

 

 

After much hesitation, and some convincing from Lisa, we all decided* to sample the first seven items on the list.  (*A more accurate description would be, "some of us willfully decided, while some were forced into the decision.")  There were definitely mixed feelings regarding the acceptance of our fate, ranging from excitement, to indifference, to dread.  As the first plates arrived, eyes widened, mouths dropped, noses crinkled, and prayers were said. 

 

 

First up, was the duck gizzards!  Super chewy and rubbery, most of us had a hard time choking these down due to the texture.  I thought they smelled like fried chicken, but the taste was no match.  Alli had the most trouble with these, and had to be bullied, guilt-tripped and berated compassionately coaxed into trying one after she was singled out as the only Femme who had not tried at least one bite of everything. 

 

 

Next up, were the trotter cakes . . . made from pigs hooves . . . we immediately regretted asking the waitress what they were.  But alas, we are fearless and we were here for one reason alone.  And what do you know?  We actually kind of liked these! Kind of like crabcakes . . . except grittier.  Brandi and Meghan's favorite . . . although I'm sure Meghan would clarify here that "favorite" is used loosely, and "most tolerable" may be more appropriate. :)

 

 

What's this?  A variety of baby lettuces.  This looks like something we would eat everyday!  Except those little tan strips and curls you see scattered throughout.  Those little, seemingly innocent things are derived from pig ears!  They had an exceptionally crunchy (like stale-crunchy) consistency and a mild, salty taste.  Surprisingly unoffensive and unmemorable.

 

 

Next out were the pork belly and the marrow bones.  The belly was reminiscent of a pork rib you could find at any KC BBQ joint, except MUCH fattier.  The problem with this dish was the fatty consistency, not the taste.  The marrow bones (literally, a bone split in half, filled with marrow) were served with thick-sliced bread to spread the marrow on after you scoop it out of the bone.  This was by far the most foul-smelling of all our delicacies, and I had a hard time with the pungent, putrid aroma.  Some of the other girls didn't seem to mind it.

 

 

Everybody loves pasta, right?  Wrong!  These raviolis were stuffed with snail and prosciutto, and topped with sweetbreads, aka animal glands.  Meghan took one bite and was done with these, while Meagan really enjoyed them.  They had a familiar seafood-type smell/taste to them, and I thought they were one of the more "normal" items we tried that day.

 

Last, but not least, Lisa's favorite . . . the duck tongue tacos.  Don't let the name (or the contents) scare you.  These were actually quite tasty.  With a crunchy shell, topped off with a generous amount of cheese, and a squeeze of lime juice, I can't say that I could distinguish what duck tongue actually tastes like.  This was just another fancy taco to me.  

 

Don't let those smiles fool you . . . not everyone was a fan of the cuisine

 

In the end, we all survived, no one got sick, and we were still smiling.  I'd call that a successful adventure.  We were all extremely proud of Amy, who we expected to have the hardest time with this adventure.  She tried everything; keeping a positive attitude and open mind throughout.  You're a soldier Amy!  Thanks for reminding us what this club is all about.

Amy, not afraid of a little duck tongue

Then there was Alli, who was caught off guard by how difficult this adventure was for her.  Alli is one of the three of us who has not missed a single adventure, and she almost always asks to go first.  She is one tough and courageous girl.  We were all surprised by how much she struggled through this, but in the end she pulled it out! 

 

Alli, struggling to swallow a duck gizzard

I would pair Meghan and Brandi together as the two that didn't really care for any of it, but dutifully obliged and tried everything without too much struggle.  Meghan did admit, "I'm not very good at this mind over matter thing."  Brandi was so excited that she was finally able to partake in an adventure, I don't want to think of what all she may have been willing to try just because she could!

Meghan, thankful for the bread that accompanied the marrow

 

Brandi, getting friendly with the bone and all its marrow

One rung up the ladder, I would place myself and Jessi.  We were excited about this adventure, happily sampled everything, and kept our cool throughout.  I can't say that we will ever make a return to EV for any of the items, but we honestly enjoyed the experience and (some of) the food.

 

Destiny, poppin' gizzards

Jessi, lovin' her some gizzards

Finallly, rounding out the top tier, would be Lisa and Meagan.  If there were ever a Fear Factor, Food Edition, these girls would surely take home the top prize.  They not only tried everything, they really truly enjoyed a lot of it.  We had no doubt Lisa would be the crusader and the champion of this adventure, and she did not disappoint.  Meagan was more of a surprise.  As each plate arrived to our table, I snapped a photo before anyone started eating from it.  At one point I was slacking on the job, and Meagan had to keep me on track as she couldn't wait to try the next thing!  I saw her go back for seconds multiple times. 

 

Lisa, enjoying a little pork belly

 

Meagan, sucking marrow

Once it was all said and done, we collectively recalled our past adventures, and went around the table sharing our "pit" and our "peak." (Yes, we got it from the Kardashians)  The responses varied, and today's adventure was listed as both a "peak" and a "pit."  It was interesting to hear how our adventures have made lasting impressions, affected our emotions, and challenged us all differently.  I just love my Femmes!   

 



With Chef/Owner Michael Smith

 

Photo bonus: some candid shots that display our honest thoughts:

 

 

And, Alli being force-fed her gizzard:

 



 

Adventure #8- "And you thought you had a camel toe yesterday . . ."

Last summer, while we were all having a good time at a pool party, a wild idea popped in my head and I enthusiastically stated that I would be celebrating my 30th birthday in Cabo!  I'm sure many people have similar grand plans and exotic ideas for their milestone birthdays, many of which never come to fruition.  Luckily, I have some of the most amazing, fun-loving, generous and thoughtful friends in the world, and they happily obliged my scheming. For the past year, we have been counting down the days in anxious anticipation of our beach vacation.  On July 25, we finally found ourselves on the sandy shores of Cabo San Lucas, Mexico!  During our six-night stay, we spent plenty of time lounging by the pool, sipping frozen concoctions, and simply being "beach bums."  Let's not forget though, that we are Fearless Femmes, and we could not leave Mexico without an adventure or two under our belts.

Fearless Femmes by the famous Arco in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

For our big adventure, we took a one-hour bus ride inland to an area where desert meets mountains, creating a unique ecosystem with rocky cliffs, ravines, canyons and lush greenery.  The bus dropped us off at "base camp" where we were outfitted with helmets, harnesses, gloves, and all sorts of hooks, clips and carabiners.  After signing an all-too-familiar liability waiver and receiving a brief orientation ("don't do this unless you want to dislocate your shoulder"), we were loaded into all-terrain vehicles and taken uphill, to the start of the course.  We unloaded and started our hike through the woodsy trails that led us from one obstacle to another.  These obstacles included seven or eight ziplines, a tight-rope bridge, a rickety footbridge (Indiana Jones style), a Tarzan swing, a rock wall climb and rappelling!

All geared up and ready for adventure!  Notice the "OH MY GOD size" helmet required to fit my large dome :(

Group pic of everyone in our tour group and our funny guides

Our first runs on the zipline could be best described as cautious, with our vision focused strictly on the quickly-approaching landing platform.  Our instructions were to place our dominant hand loosely around the rope behind us, and to press our palm down on the rope when it was time to slow down at the end of the line.  I'm pretty sure we all burned through a few layers of the leather pads on our gloves because we were pumping the brakes longer and harder than we were supposed to.  However, it wasn't long before we had all warmed up to the ziplining and progressed from insecure novices to speed-seeking aficionados, some even daring enough to take our eyes off the landing platform to appreciate the surrounding scenery.  There were a few rough landings, but for the most part we all were pretty proficient.  Our final zipline was over 1600 ft long and our guides informed us that we could reach speeds of up to 45 mph! The ziplining was definitely the highlight of the day.  Even those with fears of heights said that it was much more enjoyable than they ever imagined it could be.

We were less fond of the bridges and specifically, their instability.  It didn't help that our playful guides were taunting us by bouncing on the ropes and shaking the bridge.  The general concensus on the rock wall climb was that it was easier than anticipated, and the Tarzan swing was simply a lot of fun.  Surprisingly, rappelling came in close second as the favorite event of the day.  It was also probably the proudest accomplishment amongst those who did it, as our initial concern was that this would be the most challenging and potentially terrifying of all the obstacles. 

Unfortunately, Amy and I did not complete the rappelling as I had just suffered some sort
of "episode" brought on by the physical exertion of our hike, combined with the heat and being dehydrated, and was having trouble breathing.  After resting for a few minutes and rehydrating, I was able to continue on, but didn't think the extended hike involved with the rappelling was in my best interest.  Amy stayed with me, and we were able to do an additional zipline instead of the rappelling.  This allowed us a great lookout from which we watched the other girls fly down that cliff.  We were highly entertained as the sound of their screeches carried all the way across the canyon!  I was super bummed that I was unable to complete the entire adventure, and embarrassed by my lack of physical stamina, but the girls, and our guides, were extremely understanding and compassionate.  Thanks girls for taking care of me and for carrying on when I fell short.  So proud of you all!

Alli on the rock wall climb

Amy on the crazy ladder/wall climb

Destiny on the Tarzan swing

Jessi rappelling

Meagan on the Tarzan swing (note Amy on the bridge in the background)

Final verdict?  Our Mexican outdoor adventure was a fantastic experience, in which we were being physically challenged and mentally thrilled, having fun, conquering fears, and making memories!  From our guides, to the scenery, to the young kids in our group who fearlessly led the pack, every aspect of the day was unforgettable.

The rest of our week in Cabo wasn't so bad either . . .

Adventure #7 - "I hope this doesn't affect my beer-drinking arm . . ."

For our close-knit group of friends, July equals "lake time."  For five years now, we have made an annual trip to Hidden Valley Lake for our girls weekend getaway.  This year, we decided to start the weekend with a bang!  En route to Hidden Valley (outside Mound City, KS), we made a stop at KC Watersports in Hillsdale, for an adventure that was sure to test our balance, agility and endurance . . . paddle boarding!

Possibly because this adventure was incorporated into our lake trip (or more likely, because Meghan can't keep a secret), there was no element of surprise this time.  We knew all along what we would be doing, and I think that we were all pretty excited about it.

After signing our liability waivers and paying our fees, we were ready to get this adventure underway . . . preferrably before the 100+ degree Kansas sun made it's debut.  The first challenge was working up the nerve to disrobe into our swimsuits, knowing photos would be taken and published on this blog . . . props to these self-assured, beautiful women for meeting the challenge!

Ready to rock this!

Next up, we received a quick, simple lesson from our instructor, Sarah, on how to mount the board, stand up, paddle, turn, and adjust speed.  It all sounded pretty easy actually.  Sarah encouraged us to start off paddling in a kneeling position until we were comfortable with being on the board, and then to eventually stand up.  Alli went first.  After approximately 4.7 seconds on her knees, she decided she was ready to do it like a big girl, and she did!  Up she stood, no big deal.  Her gumption inspired the rest of us to bypass the kneeling stage, and we each followed suit with no big hang-ups.  That is, until it was Amy's turn . . .  I should preface here by stating that Amy worked a 12-hour shift the night before, got off at 7am and was ready and raring to go in Hillsdale at 9am!  What a trooper she was, but unfortunately, she did not have the advantage of restful sleep the rest of us had.  Ok, so, back to the story . . . it's Amy's turn to stand up.  All the rest of us are up at this point, slightly boisterous about our success, ready to tackle this adventure . . . basically, thinking we're pretty much the shit.  Amy's knees shake as she tries to stand upright, but the instability of the board is too much as she is thrown off the back like it was a bucking bronco.  Seriously, board shoots off one way, Amy with her feet straight out in front, arms flailing, shoots another.  And in that split second we were all brought back to reality . . . "please don't let that happen to me!!!"

I must say, we look awfully good on those boards

Shortly there after, Amy was up with the rest of us, and we each made several laps around the lagoon.  After gaining some of our confidence back, we tried to learn a few "tricks" from Sarah, like different ways to spin around on the board.  When we got tired, we tandemed (put two of our boards next to each other so we each only had to row on one side, rather than alternating back and forth), and when we felt energized we tried to race (that didn't last long).  Overall, it was a very relaxing, zen-like experience, and I think we were all equally adept to it.  I would have to say that paddle boarding was a HUGE success!

A collection of shots from the day

A few points worth mentioning:

1. Alli and I each lost our balance at one point during the adventure, and fell off our feet, but were able to stay on our boards. 
2. Doesn't Alli rock that neon like no one you've ever seen??!!
3. Paddle boarding turned out to be a surprisingly "dry" activity as Amy was the only one who was ever submerged in the water.
4. Yes, we all agree . . . Jessi looks great in a bikini! ;)
5. While calm and relaxing, paddle boarding is also a great workout for your legs, core, arms and back.  We were sore the next morning, and thankful all we had to do was float in the lake all day.
6. Amy was born to party!!!
7. The Fearless Femmes are now up to FIVE liability waivers from these adventures!  Good thing we all have life and health insurance are so invincible!
8. Meghan couldn't have picked a better adventure!
9. KC Watersports is primarily known for wakeboarding . . . future adventure????
10. I bruise like a peach . . . oh wait, we all knew that already

And finally, the proud paddle boarders:

Alli

Amy

Jessi

Meghan

Destiny

Please welcome our newest member . . .

Joining this world, and our club, on Tuesday, June 26 at 6:04pm, is Tegan Lee Lewis!!!  Weighing in at 7 lbs 14 oz and 19.5 in long, she is one of the MOST BEAUTIFUL babies you will ever see!!!  We are so happy and lucky to have her in our lives!  Congratulations Brandi and Jon!  You did good!



Tegan Lee Lewis, one day old

Some of the Fearless Femmes, posing as nurses, ready to welcome Tegan into the world!

Adventure #6 - "Imagine a beam of light radiating from your third eye . . . "

Today's adventure was quite different than all the other adventures we have done up to this point.  Today there was no physical challenge; no bloodshed; no stinky, sweaty or strenuous activity.  Instead, today's adventure required us to open our minds, let our guards down and search within ourselves.  Today we had psychic readings!

Alli was the planner this time, and  we met at her parents' house in Overland Park.  All, but Amy, were in attendance.  Our special guests, Vitalia and Adrienne of KC's The Local Witch, joined us and we all took our seats around the dining room table.  We each took a turn and were given the option to have a general reading, or we could focus on a specific topic/concern.  Vitalia used cards (similar to Tarot cards, but not quite the same) that we pulled from a deck to tell us where we're coming from, where we are now and where we are headed.  Some of us received poignant readings that elicited uncontrollable tears, while others felt no strong connection to their reading.  The general consensus at the end of our 1.5 hour session was that this was a positive, and very interesting experience. 

Whether it be something to look forward to in the future, something to reconcile from the past, or something to let go of today, most of us were given something to chew on.  (It's now seven hours past our adventure, and I can't stop thinking about it!)  It was an emotional, enlightening and memorable bonding experience for sure.  I hope that if nothing else, we each gained a renewed sense of reassurance and clarity about our self and our life's direction. 

I asked Vitalia what kind of vibe she got from each of us, and this was her initial impression:

Destiny- professional, an authoritative figure
Alli- fun!
Jessi- spunky
Lisa- loving and caring
Meagan- a mystery, an observer
Meghan- intelligent
*Brandi missed this part because she had to leave for a doctor's appointment

What do you think?  Was she right on?

If you are interested in having a reading of your own, please visit their website: http://www.thelocalwitch.com/default.html

*Disclaimer:  I am fully aware there are NO photos on this blog post <gasp>.  It didn't seem appropriate to take any during our adventure, and afterwards I forgot to ask our guests if they would take a photo with us, even though Jessi reminded me to do so.  As the one who is generally responsible for photos, I take full ownership and blame.  It will never happen again. :)

Ouchie!

Four days later, Jessi, Destiny and Meagan proudly display their paintball mementos

Adventure #5 - "Why are we doing this??!!"

Without a doubt, this month's adventure was the most dreaded, feared, apprehension-riddled and reluctantly approached adventure to date.  What could have had our panties in such a twist, you ask . . . PAINTBALL!!!!!!  Meagan chose this adventure because it was something she has never done and has always been scared to do.  Little did she know, she would turn out to be the most fearless of us all!  She sent an email to the rest of us a few days ahead and released a few clues as to the dress code and environment we would be in.  These clues allowed most of us to figure out what it is we would be doing, and then began the horror stories . . . "it feels like getting slapped with a wet towel," "my brother laughed at me when I told him we were doing this," "it feels like a rubberband snapping you at close proximity," "you're going to be covered in bruises," "it HURTS!!!!" 

After a few days of stewing over the certain pain we were going to endure, the time finally arrived.  We drove north on I-435 to Jaeger's Subsurface paintball.  That's right, paintball . . . in a cave! 

A place that I'm pretty sure has NEVER seen an all-female group of patrons . . . until today!!!

Meagan had pre-printed the liability waivers off their website and presented these to us in advance.  As we arrived, Lisa read aloud some of the wordage, "I understand and acknowlegde that the sport of paintball under certain circumstances may be an inherently dangerous activity that can result in the loss of life, eyesight or hearing, or a serious injury even to those who have experience in the sport.  I also understand and acknowledge that there is the chance of being injured by a falling rock . . ."  As you can imagine, this did little to allay our fears. 

We arrived on site approximately 30 minutes earlier than our scheduled timeslot, so we drove back to a gas station we had passed en route for a little liquid courage.  

Sitting in our cars in the parking lot of Jaeger's, building up our courage by way of our mouths. 

At our designated time, we made our way inside, signed our waivers, paid our fees and headed to the bathroom to change into our paintball gear.  Don't let me mislead you here.  By "gear" I don't mean shinguards, knee pads, elbow pads, or body armour (all of which we would have gladly accepted).  Our "gear" was two to three layers of old sweats, tees and jeans we didn't care about potentially ruining with paint stains.  Needless to say, after applying all layers, we were feeling quite hot and sweaty.  And thus ends the chance of any cute or flattering photos coming out of today's adventure.

All suited up and ready to battle!

We were given a brief, 5-10 minute crash course into the world of paintball: rules, regulations, equipment usage and courtesies were all reviewed.  Basically, we would be divided into two teams and the object of the game is to take out the other team's players.  You are "out" when a paintball hits you AND splatters.  Paintballs that do not rupture, do not count.  Once you are "out," you must leave the field.  Game ends once one team annihilates all members of the opposing team.  No shooting within 20 feet of each other.  If you are daring enough to find yourself within this close proximity of an opposing team member, you must yell, "Surrender!!!"  That player then surrenders and is out of the game. 

For our first game we were divided into two teams: yellow team and blue team (see above photo for team rosters).  Yellow team also had one 12 year-old boy, and blue team had two 14 year-old boys.  I should add here that one of our biggest fears going into this was that we would have to play with strangers <gasp>, so the fact that these dreaded strangers turned out to be pre-pubescent boys was a welcome relief. 

Each team assumed their positions at opposite ends of the field and then the whistle blew and it was game on.  Jessi, Alli and I were hesitant to leave the relatively safe confines of our bunker so we stayed behind while Preston, our 12 year-old teammate, set out to conquer the enemy.  Within a few minutes, Preston was out and we were left to fight our own war.  If memory serves me right, I think Alli took Meagan out next with a shot to the thigh, and then someone took Alli out with a shot to her ribs.  By this time, Jessi and I had made our way out of the bunker and were now huddled behind a couple of barrels while bullets ricocheted all around us, some even finding their targets.   Unfortunately, none of the paintballs were splattering upon impact for either Jessi or myself, leaving us to take a repeated beating.  I was hit right behind my left ear and thigh, while Jessi received several hits including the back of her arm, knee and a few other unmentionable places.  At this point, survival seemed remote, and a painful future inevitable.  In an act of desperation, I picked up an intact paintball off the ground and squeezed the paint onto my leg, thereby declaring myself out.  (Not my proudest moment)  I don't remember Jessi surrendering, but we must have looked pathetic and hopeless enough for the referee to blow the whistle and call the game.  Blue team: 1, yellow team: 0.

We left the field for a momentary reprieve before the next game.  Upon removing our facemasks, we saw that there was now a large group of men preparing to play.  We all agreed we wanted nothing to do with them, so I begged and pleaded  kindly requested that we be allowed to play a quick game, just us girls, and promised we would then promptly leave the premises, never to be seen again.  The referee liked the sounds of that as I believe he was just as wary of us as we were of his beloved sport. 

We took our places on the field once more, same teams minus the boys.  Yellow team stuck with our cautious approach, lingering behind our bunker while the blue team made their way to our turf.  Meagan later filled me in on what was going on on blue team territory.  She said that she and Lisa were strategizing sneak attacks and covering for each other, while Amy hid behind a barrel for most of the game.  One of these sneak attacks worked out for them and resulted in Alli surrendering to Meagan.  I remember hearing Alli yell, "Ahhhhh!!!  Don't shot me!!!!"  As she walked off the field, hands raised above her head, I felt a mixture of envy that she was now safe, and the familiar sense of defeat creeping up on me.  Jessi and I continued to defend our barracks, shooting rather blindly at anything we thought could have been a person.  We finally worked up the courage to leave our protective bunker, only to run out of paintballs within the first minute or so.  No ammo = no bueno.  Game over.  Blue team: 2, yellow team: 0.  Turns out no one took any hits in the second game (where did all those hundreds of paintballs go???) and Lisa and Amy skated out of there with not a single battle wound. 

Blue team and yellow team, post-battle

Once the second game ended, we could not wait to shed our extra layers, breathe unimpededly and regain our peripheral vision.  We made good on our promise, and called it a day, although I felt I could have kept playing if it would have been just us.  Final verdict?  I think Alli said it best, "that was a lot more fun than I expected!"  While we all agree paintball is definitely a "boy-sport," and probably not something we will ever choose to do again, I think it's safe to say that we are all glad we faced that fear and can now say we have done it.  Once again, I saw these amazing girls trample their trepidations, let go of their inhibitions, and release their reservations, all in the name of adventure.  I am so proud of us for stoically completing this rather painful challenge, and I thank you all for being such brave women!  Paintball . . . check. 

While I am proud to say no tears were shed during our paintball adventure, it may have had less to do with our fearlessness, and more to do with the fact that all body moisture was being profusely perspired through our pores. :)